Parashas VaYigash

Yosef had been through a lot in the last several years. He was sold to Yishmaelites by his brothers, who then sold him as a slave to Potiphar. Potiphar thought highly of Yosef, making him in charge of everything in his household except for his wife. After being falsely accused of attempting to seduce Potiphar's wife, Yosef got thrown into jail. He got released twelve years later to interpret Pharoh's dream. Pharoh, impressed by Yosef's interpetation, made him second highest authority, next to himself.

The interpretation Yosef gave Pharoh was: There were going to be seven years of bountiful produce, and seven years of severe famine. Pharoh made Yosef in charge of regulating the produce for all fourteen years. Everyone from far and near came to Yosef to stock up on food during the famine years. Yosef commanded the guards at every gate to sign in whoever entered, hoping to see his brothers on the list. He would check the list periodically. When he saw his brothers' names on the list, he summoned them before him.

At first, Yosef accused them of being spies, wondering why each brother entered in different gates (brothers usually travel in one unit.) Yosef questioned them, asking who their father was, how many brothers they have etc... They replied that their youngest brother, Binyamin, was at home with their father. He demanded that they bring Binyamin in order to prove that they weren't spies. After their journey back and forth, the brothers finally arrived with Binyamin. Upon seeing Binyamin, Yosef invited all the brothers to dine with him and stay the night. Before departing, Yosef implanted a vessel in Binyamin's sack. He accused the brothers of taking it, and suggested that the one holding the goblet would remain with Yosef, while the rest would be pardoned. In Parashas VaYigash, there's a debate between Yehuda and Yosef, whether Binyamin should stay with Yosef or leave with the brothers. Yehuda spoke harshly because he was entrusted by Yaakov to bring Binyamin back. Once Yosef saw Yehuda was ready to destroy the whole city to retrieve Binyamin, he decided the truth must come out. [1]

Yosef sent all of the Egyptians out of the room, and revealed to the brothers that he indeed was Yosef. They were all speechless and embarrassed. Yosef tried comforting them, saying, "It wasn't you who put me here, it was Hashem. He knew this would be best for me." When Yosef saw they were still in shock, he added, "You see that I am Yosef, because I am speaking to you in Lashon HaKodesh (Hebrew). Tell my father about my glory in Egypt. Rush him down here."

Yosef sent ten donkeys filled with the delicacies of Egypt and old wine, along with other things. He told the brothers, "If our father has a hard time believing you, just mention to him that I escorted you out, because that was the last halacha (law) I learned with him - the importance of accompanying a guest." Yosef sent different types of hints which revealed he was alive and well.

A couple weeks ago, I had a shabbos guest that asked me, "Why didn't the brothers do teshuva for the pain they put their father in?" Truth is, I thought to my self, I don't remember seeing anywhere that they did. The Torah mentions they went to Yaakov saying, "Yosef is alive!", but they didn't apologize. I was learning Rav Schwab's sefer (book) with my chavrusa (study partner), and noticed that he answers the question as follows: It says that Yaakov didn't believe them right away when they approached him, saying Yosef was alive, since this must have meant that the original statement they told Yaakov (making him assume Yosef was torn to pieces by animals) was a lie. The sages say, when a person lies, even the truth isn't believed. The brothers understood what they did was wrong; therefore, the only way to atone and correct their ways was to tell Yaakov about the sale of Yosef, and to ask for mechilla (forgiveness). [2]

The posuk [3] says, "And they told him [Yaakov] all the words of Yosef," including that which Yosef told the brothers, "I am Yosef, your brother, the one you sold into Egypt." Only then did Yaakov believe them.

Yosef could have told Yaakov himself that he was alive and ruler of Egypt, but that would mean the brothers would not have gotten a chance to repent properly. Having regret isn't the only step one needs to do to obtain Hashem's forgiveness. One needs to ask for forgiveness from the person he hurt as well. The Chofetz Chaim says, if a Jew harms another Jew and pleas only to Hashem for forgiveness, Hashem says 'I can only forgive you for the sin you committed against Me, but how can I forgive you for something you did to someone else? Go ask the person you harmed to forgive you." [4]

A lesson that can be learned from this week's parasha is: When a person hurts someone else, it is better to ask for forgiveness on their own, as opposed to sending a messenger to do the dirty work for them. The brothers realized it was better to ask for forgiveness on their own in order to do the full tshuva (repentance).

[It must be noted that when a person does something bad to someone else which the person wasn't aware of, and no damage came from it, then one does not have to ask that person for forgiveness. As a matter a fact, Rav Yisrael Salanter wasn't keen on people approaching the ones they hurt, telling them what they did wrong and asking for forgiveness, because that might cause the person additional pain. Each case is different, and when in doubt, ask your Rabbi.]

Have a wonderful Shabbos,
Nisso

[1] Bereshis Rabba 93:8
[2] M'ein Beis Shwai'va
[3] 45:27
[4] Sefer Chofetz Chaim 4:12

Parashas Miketz and Channuka

Parasha Miketz starts off explaining Pharoh's dream. "He was standing on the river when seven cows emerged from it - nice, fat looking ones, grazing in the reed grass. Suddenly, seven other cows emerged after them, looking scrawny and bad. These skinny cows ate up the healthy, fat looking cows..." The second dream he had was of "seven skinny stalks swallowing seven bulky stalks..." These dreams got Pharoh worried, wondering what they meant. He called everyone he could to interpret his dreams, but listened to no one. The butler remembered Yosef interpreting his dream accurately two years back, while in prison, and told Pharoh.

Pharoh summoned him, and Yosef interpreted his dreams. Not only did Yosef interpret it, but he also advised Pharoh what to do, and how to do it.

Rav Schwab asks, what was so bad about these dreams that prompted Pharoh to call the magicians of Egypt and all the wise men? Did he suspect that it was going to have an effect on the future? Rav Schwab answers, this is the way Pharoh thought: a) The majority always wins over the minority, and b) The stronger one always defeats the weaker ones. When he saw the opposite in his dreams, he was flabbergasted. He didn't think such a thing could possibly happen. It got him thinking, "Can it be that someone is trying to rebel against me? A minority, who will win?" Therefore, he searched for an interpretation to his dream. [1]

We see the concept of minority beating majority and weak winning over strong in many places. We say several times a day (during the days of Chanuka), "You (Hashem) have given the strong ones, into the hands of the weak ones...", "The majorities into the hands of the minorities, etc..." The Greeks tried destroying the Jewish religion. They prevented us from praying to Hashem, performing circumcisions, keeping Shabbos, family purity, and the list goes on. The Maccabees (the five sons of Mattisyahu; the Cohen Gadol) exerted maximum efforts to defeat the Greeks, and Hashem took care of the rest.

There is another example in this week's parasha where the "lower" overtakes the "higher." It says that Pharoh had seventy-one steps to his throne. Based on how many languages one knew, he could ascend that many steps. When Pharoh tested Yosef in different languages, Yosef was able to ascend all the way to the top step. He actually knew one more language than Pharoh did, Hebrew. Pharoh made Yosef swear not to tell anybody that he knew more languages, otherwise the people of Egypt would dismiss Pharoh as ruler. [2] Hashem had sent an angel to teach Yosef all those languages, so that Pharoh could make him part of the "high authority," since an Egyptian king or second-in-command must master all seventy languages. [3]

It's amazing how quickly Hashem can extricate a person from his dilemma, changing his whole life in a matter of seconds. A lesson which can be learned from Parashas Miketz and the story of Chanuka; When a situation seems hopeless, don't give up. Continue to have faith in Hashem, for He has infinite ways of changing a situation. Yosef went from owning nothing and living in prison, to having everything; with the ability to also provide for his family in their time of need. Yosef didn't give up on Hashem's ability to help him. He knew that the same way Hashem put him there, He could also take him out. So too by the Maccabees, they didn't lose faith in Hashem. They still davened and fulfilled mitzvos in private. They did not rationalize to excuse themselves from keeping mitzvos.

Kavei El Hashem, Chazak Viya'ametz Li'becha - Have hope in Hashem, He shall strengthen your heart.

Thanks for reading,

Nisso

[1] Me'ayin Beis Sho'aiva

[2] Midrash HaGadol 41:39

[3] Midrash HaGadol 40:1

Parashas Vayeishev

Parashas Vayeishev speaks about how Yaakov favored Yosef over his other sons. He even made Yosef a special garment with many beautiful colors, which led Yosef's brothers to hate him.

Yosef had a couple of dreams which made his brothers hate him even more. First dream: Yosef and his brothers were in the field binding sheaves, and all their sheaves surrounded Yosef's sheaf, and prostrated to it. Second dream: The sun, the moon, and all eleven stars prostrated themselves in front of Yosef. His father rebuked him asking, "What's this dream you had? Shall I, your mother, and your brothers come to bow down to you?"

Yaakov sent Yosef to Shechem, where the brothers were pasturing the sheep, to inquire about them. He asked someone along the way if they had passed his brothers, and this person said he over heard them say they were going to Doson. On his way to Doson, the brothers saw him from a distance, and plotted to kill him. Reuvain (the oldest) tried refraining his other brothers from killing Yosef. He suggested they throw him into a pit, intending to rescue him later.

When Yosef reached his brothers, they stripped him of his colorful garment and threw him into a pit. They had just sat down to eat, when they saw a Yishmaelite caravan, on its way down to Egypt. Yehuda suggested selling Yosef instead of killing him. After the sale transaction, they dipped his garment into goat's blood and brought it back to Yaakov, who concluded that Yosef had been devoured by beasts and torn into pieces.

Yosef was brought down to Egypt, and sold to an officer of Pharaoh - Potifar, the chief executioner of Egypt. Yosef found favor in his eyes because of his honesty and dedication to work. Potiphar saw something in Yosef which he didn't see in his other slaves. Yosef didn't steal or lie - rather, he caused his master's possession to increase. [1] Yosef went from serving Potiphar, to handling all his keys and withholding nothing from him except his own wife. [2]

While Yosef was sitting comfortably in Potiphar's house, Rashi explains he was eating, drinking, and curling his hair, Hashem said, "Your father is in mourning, and you curl your hair! I will bring out a bear against you." [3] Immediately after that, Potiphar's wife set her eyes upon him. (I can't imagine what she must of looked like, just kidding) She tried everything possible to seduce him, but he would not pay any attention to her. There was a day where nobody was around the house, except for Yosef. She decided then, she would make her move. She grabbed him by his garment, saying, "Be with me." He fled, leaving his garment in her hands. She was nervous that Yosef would tell Potiphar what had happened, so she quickly ran to the men of her household, claiming that Yosef had just tried seducing her, and that he fled once she cried out in a loud voice, leaving his garment in her hands.

The Torah says that she spoke to her husband (Potiphar) telling him, "The Hebrew slave came to me, the same one you brought into our home, to mock me. When I raised my voice and cried out, he fled outside." Potiphar became furious, says the posuk. He wanted to kill Yosef, but was convinced otherwise and sent him to jail instead. This line got me thinking, "Potiphar became furious with Yosef? He favored Yosef, trusting him with his possessions, and now within seconds can totally feel the opposite reaction? Only because his wife said something, before even confirming if it was accurate?!

The Chofetz Chaim says, "Many people tell their family members (specifically husbands and wives) all the bad things people did to them in yeshiva, or at work. The spouses ask each other how their day went, and feel the need to tell them even the negative things that happened. Not only is it a big sin, but it will also cause fighting between the two families. Spouses won't come to confirm the information. They will be on their husband/wife's side out of loyalty to one another, and will believe the statement automatically."[4]

A lesson learned from this week's parasha is, if there was someone who offended you, and your spouse, brother, sister - or any other family member for that matter - asks how your day was, try not to mention the negative things. Attempt to speak around the question (even if it's beneficial information). As we see by Potiphar, he really liked Yosef and trusted him 100%, but that all changed only because his wife spoke bad of him. One must realize that no matter what the situation is, family comes first; therefore, out of loyalty they will come to believe the statements before confirming anything else. The same applies to the one asking the question. Don't be a 'Potiphar;' who jumps to conclusions without first making sure the information was correct. There are two sides to every story.

Have a wonderful Shabbos,

Nisso

[1] Bereshis Raba 86:3

[2] Bereshis Raba 86:7

[3] Bereshis 39:6

[4] Sefer Chofetz Chaim, Hilchos Lashon Hara, 8:10

Parashas Vayishlach

In last week's Parasha (Vayeitzei), the sons of Lavan told their father that Yaakov had taken all that belonged to him - his flocks and family etc... After accepting this false statement, Lavan no longer looked at Yaakov the same way. Yaakov noticed this change in Lavan, and told Rachel and Leah, in secret, that it was time to go.

This week's Parasha starts off with Yaakov and his family on their journey home, to Yaakovs family. Yaakov sent messengers to Eisav to tell him he was back and wished to live in peace with him. Yaakov gave them detailed instructions on how to deal with Eisav. "Humble yourselves before him. Call him, 'My master.' However, make sure he knows our position. Tell him in my name, 'I have lived with Lavan, the master of all magicians and swindlers, but I overcame him. Despite living in Lavan's house, I fulfilled all 613 mitzvos. I have acquired oxen, donkeys, sheep, servants and maidservants.' Yaakov was telling Eisav that if he wants peace, then Yaakov is ready for peace; but if it is war he seeks, Yaakov is ready for that as well. The messengers went to do as they were told, but later came back with discouraging news. "Eisav is coming out to meet you with four hundred men." [1]

The posuk says, "Yaakov was very frightened and distressed." How can it be Yaakov was scared? Scared of what? Doesn't he have Hashem protecting him? Additionally, he had just sent messengers to Eisav saying he was 'ready for war'- what was that all about? He seemed pretty confident then, what happened now?? There are LOTS of explanations for this. Rashi says, "He feared the possibility he might get killed, and was distressed that he might have to kill others." [2] The Toldos Yitzchak says, "Yaakov was afraid because he remembered Eisav mentioning many years back that he was going to kill him when Yitzchak (their father) dies. Yaakov thought for sure he was an avel (a mourner).

Another possible answer: There is a special mitzva of Kibud Av V'Em (honoring one's parents) which prolongs one's life (as mentioned in the Torah). [3] Yaakov wasn't in the same home town as his father, and Eisav was. Yaakov was worried, "I didn't fulfilled the mitzvah of Kibud Av V'em as much as Eisav did." The Ramban explains that the mitzvah of kibud av v'em was only fulfilled once Yaakov went to Lavan's house, as he was instructed by his parents. [Rivka instructed Yaakov to flee from his brother's rage; and Yitzchak instructed him to find a wife in Lavan's household.] However, instead of going straight to Lavan's house, he went to yeshiva. For the fourteen years he was learning in yeshiva, he didn't have the chance to honor his parents. Therefore, Eisav may have done more kibud av v'em than Yaakov. Maybe this explains why Yaakov was afraid he would die - he might not have merited a prolonged life like Eisav did.

An additional explanation as to why Yaakov was afraid: Yaakov knew that if any member of his camp had sinned, Hashem would not come to his assistance. [4] This is a very fundamental lesson. The Rambam says, "Everyone should see themselves throughout the year as if they have the same amount of sins and mitzvos (merits), which also has an influence on the whole world. One should think, 'If I sin, then the whole world is judged harshly, but if I do a mitzva, then the whole world is judged favorably because of me.' [5] This gives a person a tremendous responsibility to the world.

A parable can explain this concept better: A child is a parent's responsibility. Every action the parent makes has an effect on the child. A simple example is; leaving a sharp knife on the table, or medication where the child can reach it. The outcome can be deadly.

A lesson we can learn by Yaakov being "afraid," is that a person must always think, "the whole world is depending on me. Every occurance is dependent on my actions. Suppose I do something wrong, what will happen to my family or friend? Do I really want to take that risk?"

Have a wonderful Shabbos,

Nisso

[1] Bereshis Rabba 75:6
[2] Rashi 32:8
[3] Shmos 20:12
[4] Bereshis Rabba 76:2

[5] Hilchos Tshuva 3:4

Parashas Vayeitzei

Last week we spoke about Eisav being furious with Yaakov for getting his brachos (blessings). After that episode, Rivka told Yaakov to run away because Eisav wanted to kill him. She instructed him to go to Lavan, her brother, who lived in Charan. There he would meet Rachel, his soul mate, the daughter of Lavan.

When Yaakov saw Rachel, he immediately fell in "love" with her, knowing she was the one he wanted to spend his whole life with. He told her the reason for him coming to Lavan. She warned him that Lavan was a swindler, and would try marrying off Leah first, before allowing him to marry Rachel. Yaakov wasn't worried. He instructed Rachel what to answer if he asked her different questions, a sign of knowing who was really under the veil. [1]

Lavan came out to greet Yaakov, who was known to come from a wealthy family. Lavan wasn't interested in him, he was interested in his money. To Yaakov's dismay, he arrived empty handed. He felt bad because when Eliezer (the slave of Avraham) had come to the house of Besuel (the father of Lavan) to find a marriage partner for Yitzchak, he came with camels loaded with gifts. Lavan thought, it can't be that Yaakov came empty handed. He is probably hiding some pearls in his mouth. He gave Yaakov a BIG kiss, hoping to find some type of jewelry, but his mouth was empty. [2]

Yaakov told Lavan the purpose of his arrival; to get married. Therefore, he is willing to work for him for seven years, in exchange for Rachel. Those years passed in a flash. When people have a goal, and are willing to do whatever they can for it, they have an inner enthusiasm. When a person does something with enthusiasm, and enjoys what they are doing, time flies. This seems to be what the Torah means by, "They seemed to him like a few days." [3]

When it was time to marry "Rachel", all the people of Charan were invited to the wedding. The next part was a big shocker. Definitely a lesson we can take, but not what I want to address in this week's dvar Torah. Rachel didn't want her sister to get embarrassed in front of the whole neighborhood, and so she gave over the signs to Leah, so that Yaakov will think it was really Rachel. That was an incredible sacrifice Rachel made. [4]

The next morning after finding out what Lavan had done to Yaakov, he approached Lavan asking, "I have worked for you honestly and respectfully to marry your daughter Rachel, why did you deceive me?" Lavan replied back, "It's not our custom to marry off the younger daughter before the older one, however, I am willing to give you Rachel for another seven years worth of work." Yaakov agreed. He worked for Lavan with the same enthusiasm as he did in the beginning. He started off strong and on-time, and followed with the same enthusiasm until the end, with no slacking off. His last years were performed with the same dedication and vigor as his first years. [5]

A lesson I want to share with you is; when people set goals for themselves, they should stick to it. Sometimes people think to themselves, "I can't believe I told my self I was going to finish this masechta (tractate) - it's so long!" or "I'm going to help my spouse every day cleaning, or cooking." At first they think it's an amazing idea, and they do it with enthusiasm. Unfortunately that fire they had to learn or help, dies down shortly, until it turns into little spark. They rationalize to themselves, "I had more time then, it was easier to work towards my goal, but now I have other important things to do." That can be true, but to what extent? Yaakov knew the concept of, "When there's a will, there's a way." He lived by it. His goal was to marry Rachel, and he was willing to work fourteen years for it. He didn't rationalize saying, "It's so hard working for a thief, always thinking what other way will I be deceived again." He didn't let anything stop him. He kept the flame going, refraining it from dying down into a spark, which would eventually be extinguished.


Have a wonderful Shabbos,

Nisso



[1] Magilla 13b
[2] Bereshis Rabba 70:13
[3] Bereshis 29:20
[4] Baba Basra 123
[5] Bereshis Rabba 70:18

Parashas Toldos

There is a lot of drama in Parashas Toldos. Rivka was in a lot of pain from her pregnancy. She felt like there was a war going on inside of her. When she passed by a yeshiva, she felt as if the baby was struggling to escape. (I guess optimistically speaking, it sounds like a good thing, because that would imply the baby wanted to learn Torah.) On the other hand, when she passed by a place of idol-worshipers, she felt the baby again struggling to escape. "This pain is unbearable, why did I want this pregnancy?" She asked herself. She went to Shaim for an answer, and through divine inspiration, he replied, "There are two nations in your womb, and two Kingdoms will separate from within you; one to his evil ways, and the other to his wholesomeness."[1] (Not the type of news a mother wants to hear about her children.)



Then Yaakov and Eisav were born. Up until the age of 13, they were both learning in yeshiva. After that, they each went their own way. Yaakov continued learning in different yeshivas, while Eisav went out hunting animals. [2] The next topic in the Parasha is Avraham's death, followed by Eisav selling his birthright to Yaakov. Eisav came back tired and hungry from a hard day of hunting. He saw Yaakov cooking lentils, a mourner's dish [3], and asked him for it. Yaakov, feeling intimidated wondered, "how is it that this wicked man who denies olam haba, be the future head of the household? He isn't worthy of offering sacrifices for the household!"[4] Yaakov therefore explained to Eisav that since he was making the lentil dish, a mitzvah of kibud av v'em (honoring one's parents), the only way to give it away was by acquiring another mitzva. Buying Eisav's birthright definitely fell under the category of a mitzva, and so Yaakov sold this lentil dish. [5]



Later on, Yitchak loses his eye sight, and is prevented by Hashem from blessing Eisav. Rivka commanded Yaakov, "bring me two young goats, in order to cook it the way your father likes it, and serve it to him. After he finishes eating the meal, he will give you Eisav's brachas." Yaakov was worried because Eisav was hairy, and Yaakov wasn't. Rivka gave him Eisav's special garment, and the skins of the young goats. She placed them on his arms and the smooth part of his neck.



We see that this ploy worked and Yaakov received Eisav's blessings from Yitzchak. When Eisav found out that his bracha was given to his brother, he was enraged. Now, realize we are talking about Eisav here. Someone who didn't care about keeping the Torah, and even denied Hashem's hashgacha (providence). [6] Why was he so emotional about not receiving his brachas? Eisav doesn't seem like the sensitive type, and yet the posuk says he 'wailed a most loud and bitter cry.' [7] We see, there must be something special about getting a bracha. Eisav begged Yitzchak for a bracha. "Please, I will take anything! There must be something for me too!" he exclaimed. "Although he is a rasha (evil)," Hashem said to Yitzchak, "he shall not have wept in vain. Bless him!" [8]



A lesson I got from Parashas Toldos is the importance of a bracha. We take them for granted. If Eisav wept over it, there must be something to it. He didn't give up, until Yitzchak gave him something. I've noticed that when I give people brachas, they reply back "thank you." I always tell them, it was a bracha, not a compliment. You should answer "amen." If I'm lucky, I sometimes get a "v'chen lomar" (you too) in return. I was always told that you can learn something from anyone. Even from a person who isn't exactly the best role model. Eisav was a rasha, but we see when it came to receiving a bracha, he was makpid (stringent.) He knew the importance it held, and cried until he got one.



I give us all a bracha that we should fulfill the Torah and Hashem's commandments, and by doing that, may we find favor in our Creator's Eyes.



Have a wonderful shabbos,

Nisso





[1] Rashi 25: 22-24

[2] Bereshis Rabba 63: 14-16

[3] Baba Basra 16

[4] Midrash Agada 25:29

[5] Tosfos HaRash

[6] Zohar 228 Vayechi

[7] Bereshis 27:34 (translation taken from Metsuda Chumash)

[8] Midrash Tanchuma

Parashas Chayei Sarah

In this week's parasha, Avraham buys a plot of land for his wife Sarah's burial. It's not just any plot of land, but Ma'aras Hamachpaila! Going back to Parashas Vayera for a minute, we learned that Avraham was very quick to perform the mitzva of Hachnasat Orchim (serving guests). When he saw three people outside his tent, he offered them bread, but also brought in butter, milk, and meat.

Avraham needed to slaughter three calves because he wanted to serve the guests tongues with mustard. However, one of the calves got away, running to a cave in Chevron. Avraham was right behind it, [1] entered the cave, and had a vision of Adam and Chava being buried there. The cave also had the sweet aroma of Gan Eden. He knew then that he wanted to own that space. [2]

This beautiful plot of land was owned by a man named Efron - not exactly the type of person one wants to do business with! At first, Avraham says to Bnei (the people of) Cheit, "I am a foreigner and a resident among you." Rashi (commentary) says a midrashic (story) meaning: "If you want to sell it to me, then I am a stranger; if not, then I am a resident among you, and will take this land against your will, for Hashem has told me, "To your descendants I will give this land." They responded saying it would be their pleasure for Avraham to bury Sarah anywhere he wanted.

Efron told Avraham in front of Bnei Cheit, " Please, my master; I've given you the field together with the cave, for it is yours." To show that he had rightful ownership for future generations, Avraham didn't want to take the land for free. So he replied back saying, "I want to pay you for it, please name your price." Efron, a person who says A LOT and does A LITTLE, told Avraham he is willing to sell it for 400 silver shekels of the best currency. Avraham had NO objection. He knew that Ma'aras Hamachpaila was worth every shekel he owned. Besides the big mitzva of burying the dead, Ma'aras Hamachpaila was the 'entrance of Gan Eden.' When a person leaves this world after 120 years, they leave with nothing besides the schar (merit) they accumulated while alive. Everything else means nothing in Olam Haba (the world to come). A person's wealth, honor etc stays on Earth.

[Do you know that when babies are born, they come out with their hands closed; and when people die, their hands are open? It symbolizes that when people enter this world, they are materialistic, wanting everything (especially babies), but when they leave, what good is their wealth anyway?]

While Avraham was weighing out the silver, Efron stood by him, secretly stealing in order to gain extra money. [3] Can you believe the Chutzpa (rudeness) Efron had?! I will tell you what he didn't have. The Torah removed a letter from his name because of his indecency [4]. Little did Efron know, Hashem blessed Avraham, [5] saying, "He who curses you, shall be cursed." He wasn't exactly gaining anything by stealing, rather, he acquired for himself poverty! [6]

We see a similar middah by Besuel (Rivka's father). He tried poisoning Eliezer (Avraham's servant, who was on a mission to find a wife for Avraham's son, Yitzchak) during a meal, in order to kill him and steal his wealth. The midrash states that an angel (who accompanied Eliezer) switched their plates and Besuel died instead. [7] The possessions Besuel was trying to steal belonged to Avraham, not Eliezer. He who curses Avraham, shall be cursed...

A lesson which we can take is that sometimes people try to take advantage of others instead of helping them. People justify their deeds, without asking themselves, "would I like it if someone acted that way to me?" Although they may gain from their trickery now, in the long run, they will realize it wasn't worth it. (Obviously, this is talking about people who haven't done full teshuva) Some get punished right away, and some don't. If they do not get paid back in this world, they definitely will in the next. We see that Efron was punished right away for taking advantage of Avraham, whereas Avraham was rewarded for his good deeds.

Thanks for reading,
Nisso


Sources...
[1] Baba Matizah 86
[2] Zohar Chadash; Ruth
[3] Midrish HaGadol 23:16
[4] Bereshis 23:16
[5] Bereshis 12:3
[6] Bereshis Rabba 58:9
[7] Midrash Agada 24:53

Parashas Vayera 2

As mentioned in my previous Dvar Torah, the beginning of the Parasha takes place by Avraham's tent. He was waiting by the opening of his tent, because he really wanted to have guests. The problem is, it was so hot, there were no travelers. So Hashem decided that He was going to visit Avraham first, and then send three angels to appear like humans. From here we learn already that there's a mitzva to visit the sick.

When Avraham would have people eat by him, he would tell them to "thank the Master of the Universe for this meal He gave you." If they were to reply. "No. Who is this God of yours, whom we do not see?" Then he would say "Ok, in that case you own me money for the meal, and then since you ate my steak, that would be $20, and the drinks are $20 per cup, and the bread-- you can't get bread out here in the desert, that will be $20." They would reply back, "You are right, who is this Master whom you ask us to thank? We will!"? By doing this, Avraham was able to accomplish his goal of spreading Hashem's name around the world. (Bereshis Rabba, 59:7)

Sefer Moreh Nevuchim (a book written by the Rambam) says that Avraham, who was blessed with great wealth, utilized his entire fortune for the purpose of glorifying Hashem's name in the world. Can you imagine taking your monthly paycheck and setting it aside for Hashem?



Anytime my daughter hears coins jingling, she automatically runs towards the noise and says, "Frida - want - give - tzidaka (charity)". She will literally take any coin she sees and deposit it into the tzidaka box if we don't stop her. We can't leave any coins laying around. She doesn't have a concept of how much money she is giving. She just gives. That is --somewhat-- like Avraham. He doesn't make calculations. He knows that if it's for Hashem, then it's worth every dime. He isn't worried that maybe his money will go to waste, because when one gives something for the sake of Hashem, Hashem will give it back.

I was learning a Gemara (Talmud) the other week (Beitza 16), and it says that a person's parnasa (monetary status) is decreed on Rosh Hashana (the Jewish New Year) except if someone spends money for Shabbos, Yom Yov, or Talmud (learning) Torah. Tosfos (commentary)mentions there that Hashem says, 'you should even borrow money on My name, and I, Hashem will pay the money back.' This is because the mitzvos of Shabbos, Yom Tov, and Talmid Torah are very chaviv (special) to Hashem.

The Rambam writes there's a chi'yuv (obligation) that if a father can not teach his son Torah, then he should hire someone to teach him. Just because the father doesn't know how to teach his son Torah, that doesn't make him patur (dismissed) from teaching him. He needs to pay from his own pocket to give his son the education.



Hashem gave us his precious vessel, the Torah. It's up to us to make the most of it. In Gemara Berachos it mentions how Torah should be learned day and night. Without Torah, there is no reason for this world to exist. Maybe that's a reason why there are time zones. On one side of the world people are getting up to start their day, while the other side is getting ready for bed. G-d forbid there should be even ONE second of nobody learning Torah.



A lesson we could take from Parashas Vayera is that one should do as much as they can to sanctify the name of Hashem. Avraham was a paragon of thanking Hashem constantly for everything he was given. He used what Hashem gave him to the full capacity, and shared it with others, asking nothing in return but a "Thank you" to Hashem. Another way to say 'Thank you' to Hashem is by learning his Torah. If you gave someone a gift, wouldn't you get nachas (pleasure) to see it being used?

Thanks for reading,

Nisso

Parashas Vayera 1

At the end of Parashas Lech Lecha, Avraham gets a bris mila at the age of 99! This was done before Yitzchak was born, because Hashem wanted Yitzchak to be holy from birth. This bris was to ensure that we, the jews will inherit Eretz Yisroel (Israel). After the bris, Avraham was changed in two ways: a physical change and a name change. He went from being called Avram, 'father of your native land Aram', to Avraham, 'father of many nations'.

In the beginning of Vayera, the parasha takes place by Avraham's tent. It was the third day of his bris - the most painful day. Hashem made it exceptionally hot outside in order for Avraham to worry about himself instead of worrying about his guests.

The blazing heat of gehenom (hell) didn't stop Avraham from wanting to fulfill the mitzva (commandment) of serving guests, though. As a matter of fact, he was in great agony - not because of the bris, but because he wasn't able to be hospitable. His whole life was about giving to others, and to Hashem. Not only was he a giver, but he did it with true love. People like Avraham don't feel like they need to take vacations. The last thing on Avraham's mind was, "I've given so much to others. Now it's time for someone to give back, especially when I'm in great need of it!".

Chazal (Our sages) say that a person who accustoms himself to giving acquires a trait of love. This is spoken about a lot in Shalom Bayis (harmony in the house) classes. Speakers stress how a husband and wife should always give to each other, and that will make their love grow for one another. Sounds crazy, doesn't it? You would think it's the opposite; if someone always receives things, that would make their love grow for the giver, because they are on the receiving end.

Chazal say, look at the Hebrew word for love, Ahava. The word Ahava has a root word, like most words. The root word is Hav, to give. The more a person gives, the more his love grows for the person he is giving to.

Pirkei Avos (Ethics of our Fathers) 1:15 says, "Emor Mi'at v'Asei Harbeh," (Say a little and Do a lot.) Avraham's actions were more numerous then his words. When the guests came to Avraham, he quickly told them, "I will get bread, and you will sustain your hearts." Then it says that Avraham quickly ran, getting some butter, milk, meat etc... What happened to just getting some bread? It could be that Avraham felt if he were to offer a whole meal, they might have refused, or felt weird saying ok. So he therefore offered something simple, and conjured up a feast.

Sometimes people say, "Oh, I have to visit Yaakov, he's in the hospital." Then, when it comes to be mivaker cholim (visit the sick), they say, "ah, you know what, Yaakov will be out in a day anyways, when he comes home I will pay him a visit", until that visit turns into a phone call made by Yaakov. There are times when, for all of their words, people don't take action at all. Avraham not only fulfilled his word, but in fact did much more.

A lesson we should take from this is that when one has guests, don't wait for them to ask for a drink. People are shy when it comes to asking for something, no matter how much they need it. Offer it right away! Maybe offer a cup of water, and serve some cookies along with it. It's no steak, but the mitzva definitely has the same value.


Have a wonderful Shabbos,
Nisso

Parashas Lech Lecha

This week, on the 8 of Cheshvan, my twin sister and I turn 26! That means, it's going to be my Double Bar Mitzvah!

Thirteen years ago was the time my obligation of observing Hashems Mitzvos (commandments) began! I can't believe that. Time flies really quickly!

My bar mitzvah Parasha is a very interesting one, with A LOT going on, and a lot of lessons to be learned.
The parasha starts off with Hashem telling Avraham to leave his home-land, a place which he is familiar with and comfortable, and go somewhere else. Where? Avraham wasn't even sure!

This was considered one of his 10 tests. Why was this a test? People do it all the time! I have friends who joined this program where you learn in Israel for two years and then they ship you off to a place where there aren't so many observant Jews. The goal is to be mikarev (bring close) those who aren't familiar with Jewish laws and customs, and help them work through it, step by step. --Yes, it's a little nerve-racking, but it's been done plenty of times! What was so special about this test?!

So I was thinking, the beauty of this test was to see what would be Avraham's emotional reaction to Hashem's request. Would Avraham be nervous to go [especially when he didn't know where he was going, or what kind of people would be there], scared, excited, stubborn, or easygoing?

Avraham did as Hashem asked from him, with out inquiring even once: "How long will it take? Who will be there? Is it safe?" He passed this test successfully. The reason was because he had all the emuna and bitachon (faith) in Hashem, so he didn't have to ask any questions. He knew that if Hashem sent him there, then it must good for him.

I lent someone a jar of coffee, and when they returned it, my daughter asks "What's this? I want." I told her, "You don't like it. Trust daddy." She says "I like it, I want". So I told her, "Trust daddy, Frida doesn't like this, it's yukee. I know what Frida likes." After I told her that, she said, "Ok, daddy," and walked away.

I was so proud of her, and I thought to my self, "Wow, she trusts me, it's so nice!". She knows that I wouldn't give her anything that wasn't good for her. She didn't need to taste the bitterness of the coffee to find out it wasn't good. She had faith in my words.

The lesson we should take from Parashas Lech Lecha, is for whenever something seems to be going wrong, and your day isn't as you planned. You might not know why it turned out that way, or how it is going to end up. Everything is done for a reason. Avraham didn't know where he was going; however, Hashem did. He sees the whole picture.

That should be our attitude towards Hashem. We shouldn't have to ask questions on Him. We should just accept that Hashem knows what's best for us. Hashem knows that even though we planned for something, it might not be good for us in the long run. Therefore, He steers our plans [and future] to another direction. Avraham understood that. He knew that no matter what came his way, he would be taken care of.

I pray for us all that we should do Hashem's will without asking any questions, and do His avodah (work) with Simcha (happiness)!

Have a wonderful shabbos!

Thank you for visiting,
Nisso

Parashas Noach

Hi,

The weather was slightly cold and rainy in Yerushalayim this week. I was even zocheh to make a bracha on a rainbow. Chachamim say that when a rainbow appears it is a siman that Hashem wants to destroy the world, but doesn't because of His promise. I thought, WOW, that's this week's parasha.

In parashas Noach, Hashem totally wipes out the whole world except for Noach, his family, and the Jerusalem Biblical Zoo-- or something along those lines. =)

Last week during Shabbos Mincha, we read parashas Noach, and it got me thinking. I can't believe it. It's only the second week, and already (after 10 generations) Hashem destroys the world. How is this possible?! We just came into creation not long ago, and now we are destroyed? That generation had to have been REALLY bad. A chunk of the reason was because of how they acted with one another. They had no respect for each other what-so-ever. Not helping one another, taking advantage of their friends. Very denigrating.

You know, it says that Noach was the greatest man of his generation. It didn't exactly seem like a compliment. I mean-- compared to the type of people in that generation, you would think anybody is great. And how was he saved? Hashem told him to seclude himself on a HUGE boat, until this world got purified. He was living with a bunch of animals, who ate different things at different times.

I have two kids bli ayin hara, and their sleeping and eating schedules aren't exactly on the dot. One needs to be fed, while the other needs a changing. Then when the other one is sleeping, one wakes up. It's tough. Note: this is not a complaint, Baruch Hashem, we are zocheh to have beautiful kids. I'm just pointing out the difficulty of having two kids on different schedules - can you imagine a whole flock of animals? If you think about it a little more, it was all planned out, maybe to make up for what that generation did. They were living their lives thinking about themselves only, while Noach's whole tachlis was to give, give and give some more. He didn't have much time for himself. He was too busy attending all the animals. Making sure they were happy.

So in truth, he really was a righteous man. For one year straight, his midda was doing the avodas Hashem, selflessly.

I think a lesson we should learn from this week's parasha, is that when we don't act with others the way we want to be acted, it can be deadly. V'ahavta L'areacha Kamo'cha, Zeh Klal Gadol B'Torah! Loving others like you love yourself, that is an important lesson in the Torah. We are on this world to learn and perform the mitzvos of Hashem's Torah. Without that, this world can not exist.

Another lesson is that when you see a neighbor or a friend speaking Loshon Harah, or going against Hashem's will, seclude your self from them. You don't need to be with those types of people. They can be damaging. Just like Noach was secluded from the rebels, you can do the same. You get to choose your friends, so choose the right ones.


Thanks for visiting,
Nisso