Someone quoted me a line from a movie they saw: “If today was your last day on earth and you asked yourself whether you would be happy with what you have accomplished in your life – If the answer is 'no', then you better start doing something.”
I thought the quote was powerful because sometimes a person “plays” around so much in his/her lifetime, it's scary to think about what they will tell Hashem in the Heavenly court.
At first, it says in this week's parasha, “And Aharon lifted up his hands to the nation and blessed them.” However, the very next posuk then says, “Moshe and Aharon went to the Ohel Moed and then they came out and blessed the nation...”[1]
If Aharon had just blessed Bnei Yisroel, then why did the next posuk say that Moshe and Aharon then blessed them again? What was wrong with Aharon's first bracha?
Rashi explains that since Aharon saw the korbonos were brought and serviced but Hashem's Sh'china didn't rest upon Bnei Yisroel, he must have done something wrong to anger Him. Aharon felt troubled and thought to himself, “I am sure that Hashem is upset with me and this is the reason why His Sh'china didn't come down!” He quickly asked Moshe to daven with him for mercy and then the Sh'china came down.
Aharon saw there was something wrong and quickly did chesbon ha'nefesh. He asked himself, “Hashem didn't bring down His Sh'china; what did I do wrong?” He quickly repented.
We have just entered the days of Sfiras Haomer. Have you ever wondered what the words under each number were, ie: chesed sh'bichesed, gvura sh'bichesed, tiferet sh'bichesed, netzach sh'bichesed, etc..?
There's a machlokes whether counting sfiras haomer (while there isn't a Beis Hamikdash) is d'orai'sa or d'rabanan. However, everyone agrees that a person is obligated to work on his characteristics during these days.
The days of Sfiras Ha'omer are preparation for our acceptance of the Torah on Shavuos. Under each number, there's another thing to work on for that day. For example, over shabbos (tonight will be the fourth night) one should be working on netzach sh'b'chesed. I have a book called “u'sifartem lachem,” which goes through each avoda for that day. It's broken up into two sections: working on the relationships between you and Hashem, and between you and friends.
One thing the sefer says in today's portion is: Between you and Hashem: “Have in mind that Hashem is forever and does tremendous amounts of chesed for us all the time. By doing this, we will come to love Hashem with all our hearts.” Between you and friends: “Any chesed you do for someone else, try doing it again some other time in order for you to get used to doing it, and it will lead you to doing it forever. Or, if you seem to be lending a friend money more than once, maybe try finding him a job by you or something similar, because this is a chesed which is long term (hopefully forever.)
May we quickly mend our bad characteristics and have our good characteristics continue throughout our long lives.
Good Shabbos and Chag Kasher vSameach,
Nisso
[1] 9:22-23
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