Parashas Toldos

There is a lot of drama in Parashas Toldos. Rivka was in a lot of pain from her pregnancy. She felt like there was a war going on inside of her. When she passed by a yeshiva, she felt as if the baby was struggling to escape. (I guess optimistically speaking, it sounds like a good thing, because that would imply the baby wanted to learn Torah.) On the other hand, when she passed by a place of idol-worshipers, she felt the baby again struggling to escape. "This pain is unbearable, why did I want this pregnancy?" She asked herself. She went to Shaim for an answer, and through divine inspiration, he replied, "There are two nations in your womb, and two Kingdoms will separate from within you; one to his evil ways, and the other to his wholesomeness."[1] (Not the type of news a mother wants to hear about her children.)



Then Yaakov and Eisav were born. Up until the age of 13, they were both learning in yeshiva. After that, they each went their own way. Yaakov continued learning in different yeshivas, while Eisav went out hunting animals. [2] The next topic in the Parasha is Avraham's death, followed by Eisav selling his birthright to Yaakov. Eisav came back tired and hungry from a hard day of hunting. He saw Yaakov cooking lentils, a mourner's dish [3], and asked him for it. Yaakov, feeling intimidated wondered, "how is it that this wicked man who denies olam haba, be the future head of the household? He isn't worthy of offering sacrifices for the household!"[4] Yaakov therefore explained to Eisav that since he was making the lentil dish, a mitzvah of kibud av v'em (honoring one's parents), the only way to give it away was by acquiring another mitzva. Buying Eisav's birthright definitely fell under the category of a mitzva, and so Yaakov sold this lentil dish. [5]



Later on, Yitchak loses his eye sight, and is prevented by Hashem from blessing Eisav. Rivka commanded Yaakov, "bring me two young goats, in order to cook it the way your father likes it, and serve it to him. After he finishes eating the meal, he will give you Eisav's brachas." Yaakov was worried because Eisav was hairy, and Yaakov wasn't. Rivka gave him Eisav's special garment, and the skins of the young goats. She placed them on his arms and the smooth part of his neck.



We see that this ploy worked and Yaakov received Eisav's blessings from Yitzchak. When Eisav found out that his bracha was given to his brother, he was enraged. Now, realize we are talking about Eisav here. Someone who didn't care about keeping the Torah, and even denied Hashem's hashgacha (providence). [6] Why was he so emotional about not receiving his brachas? Eisav doesn't seem like the sensitive type, and yet the posuk says he 'wailed a most loud and bitter cry.' [7] We see, there must be something special about getting a bracha. Eisav begged Yitzchak for a bracha. "Please, I will take anything! There must be something for me too!" he exclaimed. "Although he is a rasha (evil)," Hashem said to Yitzchak, "he shall not have wept in vain. Bless him!" [8]



A lesson I got from Parashas Toldos is the importance of a bracha. We take them for granted. If Eisav wept over it, there must be something to it. He didn't give up, until Yitzchak gave him something. I've noticed that when I give people brachas, they reply back "thank you." I always tell them, it was a bracha, not a compliment. You should answer "amen." If I'm lucky, I sometimes get a "v'chen lomar" (you too) in return. I was always told that you can learn something from anyone. Even from a person who isn't exactly the best role model. Eisav was a rasha, but we see when it came to receiving a bracha, he was makpid (stringent.) He knew the importance it held, and cried until he got one.



I give us all a bracha that we should fulfill the Torah and Hashem's commandments, and by doing that, may we find favor in our Creator's Eyes.



Have a wonderful shabbos,

Nisso





[1] Rashi 25: 22-24

[2] Bereshis Rabba 63: 14-16

[3] Baba Basra 16

[4] Midrash Agada 25:29

[5] Tosfos HaRash

[6] Zohar 228 Vayechi

[7] Bereshis 27:34 (translation taken from Metsuda Chumash)

[8] Midrash Tanchuma

Parashas Chayei Sarah

In this week's parasha, Avraham buys a plot of land for his wife Sarah's burial. It's not just any plot of land, but Ma'aras Hamachpaila! Going back to Parashas Vayera for a minute, we learned that Avraham was very quick to perform the mitzva of Hachnasat Orchim (serving guests). When he saw three people outside his tent, he offered them bread, but also brought in butter, milk, and meat.

Avraham needed to slaughter three calves because he wanted to serve the guests tongues with mustard. However, one of the calves got away, running to a cave in Chevron. Avraham was right behind it, [1] entered the cave, and had a vision of Adam and Chava being buried there. The cave also had the sweet aroma of Gan Eden. He knew then that he wanted to own that space. [2]

This beautiful plot of land was owned by a man named Efron - not exactly the type of person one wants to do business with! At first, Avraham says to Bnei (the people of) Cheit, "I am a foreigner and a resident among you." Rashi (commentary) says a midrashic (story) meaning: "If you want to sell it to me, then I am a stranger; if not, then I am a resident among you, and will take this land against your will, for Hashem has told me, "To your descendants I will give this land." They responded saying it would be their pleasure for Avraham to bury Sarah anywhere he wanted.

Efron told Avraham in front of Bnei Cheit, " Please, my master; I've given you the field together with the cave, for it is yours." To show that he had rightful ownership for future generations, Avraham didn't want to take the land for free. So he replied back saying, "I want to pay you for it, please name your price." Efron, a person who says A LOT and does A LITTLE, told Avraham he is willing to sell it for 400 silver shekels of the best currency. Avraham had NO objection. He knew that Ma'aras Hamachpaila was worth every shekel he owned. Besides the big mitzva of burying the dead, Ma'aras Hamachpaila was the 'entrance of Gan Eden.' When a person leaves this world after 120 years, they leave with nothing besides the schar (merit) they accumulated while alive. Everything else means nothing in Olam Haba (the world to come). A person's wealth, honor etc stays on Earth.

[Do you know that when babies are born, they come out with their hands closed; and when people die, their hands are open? It symbolizes that when people enter this world, they are materialistic, wanting everything (especially babies), but when they leave, what good is their wealth anyway?]

While Avraham was weighing out the silver, Efron stood by him, secretly stealing in order to gain extra money. [3] Can you believe the Chutzpa (rudeness) Efron had?! I will tell you what he didn't have. The Torah removed a letter from his name because of his indecency [4]. Little did Efron know, Hashem blessed Avraham, [5] saying, "He who curses you, shall be cursed." He wasn't exactly gaining anything by stealing, rather, he acquired for himself poverty! [6]

We see a similar middah by Besuel (Rivka's father). He tried poisoning Eliezer (Avraham's servant, who was on a mission to find a wife for Avraham's son, Yitzchak) during a meal, in order to kill him and steal his wealth. The midrash states that an angel (who accompanied Eliezer) switched their plates and Besuel died instead. [7] The possessions Besuel was trying to steal belonged to Avraham, not Eliezer. He who curses Avraham, shall be cursed...

A lesson which we can take is that sometimes people try to take advantage of others instead of helping them. People justify their deeds, without asking themselves, "would I like it if someone acted that way to me?" Although they may gain from their trickery now, in the long run, they will realize it wasn't worth it. (Obviously, this is talking about people who haven't done full teshuva) Some get punished right away, and some don't. If they do not get paid back in this world, they definitely will in the next. We see that Efron was punished right away for taking advantage of Avraham, whereas Avraham was rewarded for his good deeds.

Thanks for reading,
Nisso


Sources...
[1] Baba Matizah 86
[2] Zohar Chadash; Ruth
[3] Midrish HaGadol 23:16
[4] Bereshis 23:16
[5] Bereshis 12:3
[6] Bereshis Rabba 58:9
[7] Midrash Agada 24:53

Parashas Vayera 2

As mentioned in my previous Dvar Torah, the beginning of the Parasha takes place by Avraham's tent. He was waiting by the opening of his tent, because he really wanted to have guests. The problem is, it was so hot, there were no travelers. So Hashem decided that He was going to visit Avraham first, and then send three angels to appear like humans. From here we learn already that there's a mitzva to visit the sick.

When Avraham would have people eat by him, he would tell them to "thank the Master of the Universe for this meal He gave you." If they were to reply. "No. Who is this God of yours, whom we do not see?" Then he would say "Ok, in that case you own me money for the meal, and then since you ate my steak, that would be $20, and the drinks are $20 per cup, and the bread-- you can't get bread out here in the desert, that will be $20." They would reply back, "You are right, who is this Master whom you ask us to thank? We will!"? By doing this, Avraham was able to accomplish his goal of spreading Hashem's name around the world. (Bereshis Rabba, 59:7)

Sefer Moreh Nevuchim (a book written by the Rambam) says that Avraham, who was blessed with great wealth, utilized his entire fortune for the purpose of glorifying Hashem's name in the world. Can you imagine taking your monthly paycheck and setting it aside for Hashem?



Anytime my daughter hears coins jingling, she automatically runs towards the noise and says, "Frida - want - give - tzidaka (charity)". She will literally take any coin she sees and deposit it into the tzidaka box if we don't stop her. We can't leave any coins laying around. She doesn't have a concept of how much money she is giving. She just gives. That is --somewhat-- like Avraham. He doesn't make calculations. He knows that if it's for Hashem, then it's worth every dime. He isn't worried that maybe his money will go to waste, because when one gives something for the sake of Hashem, Hashem will give it back.

I was learning a Gemara (Talmud) the other week (Beitza 16), and it says that a person's parnasa (monetary status) is decreed on Rosh Hashana (the Jewish New Year) except if someone spends money for Shabbos, Yom Yov, or Talmud (learning) Torah. Tosfos (commentary)mentions there that Hashem says, 'you should even borrow money on My name, and I, Hashem will pay the money back.' This is because the mitzvos of Shabbos, Yom Tov, and Talmid Torah are very chaviv (special) to Hashem.

The Rambam writes there's a chi'yuv (obligation) that if a father can not teach his son Torah, then he should hire someone to teach him. Just because the father doesn't know how to teach his son Torah, that doesn't make him patur (dismissed) from teaching him. He needs to pay from his own pocket to give his son the education.



Hashem gave us his precious vessel, the Torah. It's up to us to make the most of it. In Gemara Berachos it mentions how Torah should be learned day and night. Without Torah, there is no reason for this world to exist. Maybe that's a reason why there are time zones. On one side of the world people are getting up to start their day, while the other side is getting ready for bed. G-d forbid there should be even ONE second of nobody learning Torah.



A lesson we could take from Parashas Vayera is that one should do as much as they can to sanctify the name of Hashem. Avraham was a paragon of thanking Hashem constantly for everything he was given. He used what Hashem gave him to the full capacity, and shared it with others, asking nothing in return but a "Thank you" to Hashem. Another way to say 'Thank you' to Hashem is by learning his Torah. If you gave someone a gift, wouldn't you get nachas (pleasure) to see it being used?

Thanks for reading,

Nisso

Parashas Vayera 1

At the end of Parashas Lech Lecha, Avraham gets a bris mila at the age of 99! This was done before Yitzchak was born, because Hashem wanted Yitzchak to be holy from birth. This bris was to ensure that we, the jews will inherit Eretz Yisroel (Israel). After the bris, Avraham was changed in two ways: a physical change and a name change. He went from being called Avram, 'father of your native land Aram', to Avraham, 'father of many nations'.

In the beginning of Vayera, the parasha takes place by Avraham's tent. It was the third day of his bris - the most painful day. Hashem made it exceptionally hot outside in order for Avraham to worry about himself instead of worrying about his guests.

The blazing heat of gehenom (hell) didn't stop Avraham from wanting to fulfill the mitzva (commandment) of serving guests, though. As a matter of fact, he was in great agony - not because of the bris, but because he wasn't able to be hospitable. His whole life was about giving to others, and to Hashem. Not only was he a giver, but he did it with true love. People like Avraham don't feel like they need to take vacations. The last thing on Avraham's mind was, "I've given so much to others. Now it's time for someone to give back, especially when I'm in great need of it!".

Chazal (Our sages) say that a person who accustoms himself to giving acquires a trait of love. This is spoken about a lot in Shalom Bayis (harmony in the house) classes. Speakers stress how a husband and wife should always give to each other, and that will make their love grow for one another. Sounds crazy, doesn't it? You would think it's the opposite; if someone always receives things, that would make their love grow for the giver, because they are on the receiving end.

Chazal say, look at the Hebrew word for love, Ahava. The word Ahava has a root word, like most words. The root word is Hav, to give. The more a person gives, the more his love grows for the person he is giving to.

Pirkei Avos (Ethics of our Fathers) 1:15 says, "Emor Mi'at v'Asei Harbeh," (Say a little and Do a lot.) Avraham's actions were more numerous then his words. When the guests came to Avraham, he quickly told them, "I will get bread, and you will sustain your hearts." Then it says that Avraham quickly ran, getting some butter, milk, meat etc... What happened to just getting some bread? It could be that Avraham felt if he were to offer a whole meal, they might have refused, or felt weird saying ok. So he therefore offered something simple, and conjured up a feast.

Sometimes people say, "Oh, I have to visit Yaakov, he's in the hospital." Then, when it comes to be mivaker cholim (visit the sick), they say, "ah, you know what, Yaakov will be out in a day anyways, when he comes home I will pay him a visit", until that visit turns into a phone call made by Yaakov. There are times when, for all of their words, people don't take action at all. Avraham not only fulfilled his word, but in fact did much more.

A lesson we should take from this is that when one has guests, don't wait for them to ask for a drink. People are shy when it comes to asking for something, no matter how much they need it. Offer it right away! Maybe offer a cup of water, and serve some cookies along with it. It's no steak, but the mitzva definitely has the same value.


Have a wonderful Shabbos,
Nisso

Parashas Lech Lecha

This week, on the 8 of Cheshvan, my twin sister and I turn 26! That means, it's going to be my Double Bar Mitzvah!

Thirteen years ago was the time my obligation of observing Hashems Mitzvos (commandments) began! I can't believe that. Time flies really quickly!

My bar mitzvah Parasha is a very interesting one, with A LOT going on, and a lot of lessons to be learned.
The parasha starts off with Hashem telling Avraham to leave his home-land, a place which he is familiar with and comfortable, and go somewhere else. Where? Avraham wasn't even sure!

This was considered one of his 10 tests. Why was this a test? People do it all the time! I have friends who joined this program where you learn in Israel for two years and then they ship you off to a place where there aren't so many observant Jews. The goal is to be mikarev (bring close) those who aren't familiar with Jewish laws and customs, and help them work through it, step by step. --Yes, it's a little nerve-racking, but it's been done plenty of times! What was so special about this test?!

So I was thinking, the beauty of this test was to see what would be Avraham's emotional reaction to Hashem's request. Would Avraham be nervous to go [especially when he didn't know where he was going, or what kind of people would be there], scared, excited, stubborn, or easygoing?

Avraham did as Hashem asked from him, with out inquiring even once: "How long will it take? Who will be there? Is it safe?" He passed this test successfully. The reason was because he had all the emuna and bitachon (faith) in Hashem, so he didn't have to ask any questions. He knew that if Hashem sent him there, then it must good for him.

I lent someone a jar of coffee, and when they returned it, my daughter asks "What's this? I want." I told her, "You don't like it. Trust daddy." She says "I like it, I want". So I told her, "Trust daddy, Frida doesn't like this, it's yukee. I know what Frida likes." After I told her that, she said, "Ok, daddy," and walked away.

I was so proud of her, and I thought to my self, "Wow, she trusts me, it's so nice!". She knows that I wouldn't give her anything that wasn't good for her. She didn't need to taste the bitterness of the coffee to find out it wasn't good. She had faith in my words.

The lesson we should take from Parashas Lech Lecha, is for whenever something seems to be going wrong, and your day isn't as you planned. You might not know why it turned out that way, or how it is going to end up. Everything is done for a reason. Avraham didn't know where he was going; however, Hashem did. He sees the whole picture.

That should be our attitude towards Hashem. We shouldn't have to ask questions on Him. We should just accept that Hashem knows what's best for us. Hashem knows that even though we planned for something, it might not be good for us in the long run. Therefore, He steers our plans [and future] to another direction. Avraham understood that. He knew that no matter what came his way, he would be taken care of.

I pray for us all that we should do Hashem's will without asking any questions, and do His avodah (work) with Simcha (happiness)!

Have a wonderful shabbos!

Thank you for visiting,
Nisso